It is 3 in the morning, I am suffering a horrible cold, and I am supposed to be getting up in five hours to get ready for church. So what am I supposed to be doing? Well obviously my brain thinks sleeping is the wrong answer.
I watch several videos on YouTube from plus size women. Mostly I am looking to see try-ons of clothing from websites I drool over but never actually take the plunge in buying from. And considering these are pretty cheap websites, that says a lot of me and my issues with taking chances lately. But I keep thinking about starting my own channel. Take risks, put myself out there. Maybe I can speak to crazy little chubbies like myself and I don’t know, spark a difference in someone’s life no matter how small that moment is in time. Perhaps it is a way to work past my anxiety and say Screw Off to all the haters and jugders that in my head are always ready to tell me I am not good enough. Who knows.
But this is probably the first step in that. I am better at the written word and I can still hold onto some mystery and such because in your head I could be anybody, and nobody all wrapped up in one. I am putting myself out there while still hiding at the same time.
I have blogged before. I struggle long term on niche blogs. Personal blogs, well I used to be the queen of vent and ramble. When I start new blogs, I come up with all these ideas to write on right away, and then after time I am burnt out because I started off strong, and then couldn’t keep up. So I am going to try to limit myself to posting just weekly, perhaps bi-weekly depending on what all is going on. I will probably schedule posts if I come up with multiple ideas at once just to keep things flowing consistently instead of glops of posts sporadically. Yes glops. I know it is not a word because of the annoying squiggly red line under it, but it feels like it should be a word in my vocabulary.
My goal for this blog is to be semi-personal in a journal like way. I want to open my life, beyond just simply being a bigger gal with any who decides to follow. Without getting into TMI zone of course. Not everything is going to be all Plus Size stuff, but since it seems to be a big part of my life, being a bigger gal, it is a pretty adequate description to the blog as a whole.
I look forward to this journey together.